Pammy writes about how she makes space for mental health breaks and ways to prioritize your mental health while working on a cruise ship. She has been working on cruise ships for over five years in a variety of positions, but most recently on Virgin Voyages for the past three years as a Production Stage Manager on three of their ships, working with musicians, acrobats, dancers, and guest artists. I hope you find value in her insight like I have when it comes to taking care of ourselves.
—
Mental health is a hot topic in the Stage Management community. Most of my off-work conversations with fellow SMs are about how it seems (and feels) that we are not allowed to have the occasional “off day,” or when we do, a sense of guilt immediately invades us. With each new SM job I’ve taken, I’ve seen progress in my self-care routines. I’ve also noticed companies getting more concerned and supportive when it comes to their employee’s mental health: I have had access to therapists, nutritionists, professional coaches, and so many other health professionals fully covered by the companies I’ve worked with. Mental health breaks are key to having a balanced life. And, I’ve learned, they are a decision.
A month ago, my life took a big turn. From working on cruise ships, living the so-called “ship life,” I embarked on a new adventure: a land-based job. This change has been quite challenging, starting with the fact that I can’t cook to save my own life. Thankfully, I moved to a city where a bunch of services are at everyone’s disposal.
By far, the biggest challenge has been managing the inner workaholic Pammy. Working on ships, one becomes accustomed to long hours and no days off. At my new job, I have a set schedule and WEEKENDS. Two full days to myself—what is that? During these days, I’m not required to answer any messages, open any emails, or answer any work-related questions. This novel concept wasn’t (and still isn’t) easy to manage.
When the weekends approach, my inner workaholic gets anxious, but with every weekend, I gradually get better at helping her relax through activities I left behind while on ships. I’m back to dancing and have started handstand classes to challenge myself to focus my energy on things other than work.
When my dear friend Bryan Runion asked me to write about mental health on cruise ships, my first thought was, “Oh, I struggled with that, I don’t think I can write about it.” However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized I could provide useful “don’ts” for everyone looking to have a more balanced life at sea. I certainly tried for my last two contracts, and I’m happy to share I was rather successful. So, here are some tips and tricks on how to take mental health breaks while working on cruise ships.
Turnaround days are your “Mini Weekends”
This might not apply to all departments, but for Entertainment it certainly does! Turnaround days are those precious hours between voyages when the ship does its quick makeover from one group of passengers to another. Passengers would start getting off around 7:00am-7:30am finishing around 10:30am. The new group of passengers would normally start boarding around 1:30pm-2:00pm. This is your window to a world of possibilities. The ship is quiet, the crew has a designated gangway to get off/on the ship, and some passenger eateries and services are available for you to enjoy… WITHOUT ANY PEOPLE. I was the type of human who needed to get out of the ship on turnaround days, but many of my friends would love to go for a run on the track, use the gym, or eat at the food court during turnaround days. Turnaround days are also the time when food, drinks, and other services will be at their very best! And with reason: you want to leave the best impression on the outgoing passengers and make the same best impression on the incoming ones. Take advantage of that! If, like me, you would rather step out fully, the next point will be very useful.
Incorporate Off-Work Activities into Your Routine
Now, let’s talk about keeping your sanity intact. Finding something to do fully unrelated to work is key, and this can be many things. For me, it was looking up one-on-one dance classes in Miami that suited my schedule. Every turnaround day, I would wake up early, get dressed, and take a taxi to class. Having that little slice of consistency in my otherwise crazy life kept me grounded. As you can imagine, this habit impacted other areas of my life rather positively: my mood was better, my capacity for concentration increased, and I was keeping myself accountable for my food and alcohol intake and sleeping better due to this. My body was moving in smarter ways, and in general, I was feeling stronger. Whether it’s a weekly class, a quick adventure, or just some quiet time with a good book, investing in things that make you happy will keep you going and make your mental health a lot better!
If getting off the ship activities isn’t possible for you, I strongly suggest finding a group of friends outside of your department who enjoy recreational activities like board games, reading, movies, video games, etc. I was loyal to my weekly DnD sessions, and board game gathers because they would keep me connected to my social self.
Investing in Self-Care
Off-ship activities can be a bit pricey, not gonna lie. Miami’s cruise terminal is a pain to get out from and the best way I found to do it was by Uber, which cost around 30 USD. My dance classes were 90 USD and the Uber back could be more than 30 depending on traffic. And well, Miami Day was also a Target day to get my curly hair essentials. In a day, I could spend between 200- 350 USD… but honestly, spend that money. But spend it on things you know will contribute to your well-being. As much as I love retail shopping therapy, let’s be real, it doesn’t last, and we normally end up buying things we don’t even need. I invite you to do what I do: replace the word “spend” with “invest.” And this goes for anything as long as you are honest with yourself. There were times when my soul really needed a place to sit with a good cup of coffee to read or write because, yes, coffee can be terrible onboard. There were other times when I wanted to go sit in a garden surrounded by plants and colorful flowers because there were close to no plants onboard. Whether it’s treating yourself to a nice meal or buying your favorite hair product, investing in things to help you feel better is totally worth it. Your future self will thank you for prioritizing those moments of happiness. If a part of you fears the amount of money some of these moments of joy cost, remember: you are taken care of onboard! And one day, you choose to get out of your routine will not break your wallet.
Embrace the Off-Ship Experience
Waking up to a new city is the biggest perk of ship life, and most Crew Members said yes to this lifestyle due to it. Getting paid to travel is a dream for many, and cruise ships make it so easy. There’s one thing I learned on board, and it is that everything can wait. Whilst there’s always a sense of urgency on ship entertainment; there’s also the ability of getting things resolved faster.
When I started as a Stage Manager onboard getting off the ship was too much pressure. There’s no denying that once you hold a management position onboard expectations get high. However, the support from your colleagues about having time off the ship for yourself also increases. There will always be someone onboard able to support the operation if you are not there. I don’t think I’ve work on a place where the phrase “the show must go on” is as true as on ships. Everyone works so close to each other that you end up, unconsciously, learning bits and pieces of other jobs that will allow you to support the operation.
So please, take a walk off the ship every now and then. Your sea legs will thank you later.
It’s Just Entertainment on a Ship
This became one of my favorite things to say, as it means acceptance. As Stage Managers, we are also guilty, from time to time, of perfectionism. So guilty that we forget one of our most important qualities as SMs: working with what we have. We are problem solvers, and as long as the cast and crew working in the productions we manage are safe, our job is being done, very well done. Onboard there are many things we can’t control, and wasting time and energy in trying to control them is absolutely useless. So don’t put yourself through that, and simply do the best that you can each day. Don Miguel Ruiz, in his book The Four Agreements, explains that our best will be different every day, and that’s more than ok.
A balanced work/life dynamic is tricky to find on ships, but it is absolutely possible. And you are not alone in this. There are a lot of people going through the same frustrating working hours with you, and you should find support in them. My last contract as a Stage Manager on ships I decided to laugh at every curved ball as there was one every day: a performer thrown into isolation, an apparatus not being fully approved to be used on shows, Qlab having a mind of it’s own, and so much more. From having to outsource scenery with ship furniture to rewriting a show two hours prior to doors, I always found a moment to stop and laugh at the situation to make connections with my cast and crew. A positive approach to everything you do onboard is, in my opinion, the best mental health pill. After all, is just entertainment on a ship.
Mental health breaks are a decision, especially on ships. Knowing what you need to be able to take them and have them work might take time, so perseverance will be important. My mom always tells me we only have one body, and it can’t be replaced. If our body fails, we won’t be able to keep doing the things we love. Take care of it and love it through practicing mental health care.